I LOVE U

Husbnd: Kya tumne mujhe KUTTA kaha?

No answer

Husbnd again asks, No answer

Then again he asks,

Wife: Nahi kaha. Plz AB bhoka na bandh karo

Girl:- I LOVE U.

Boy:- Me Too.

Girl:- How Much?

Boy:- As much As U do.

Girl:- “YOU CHEATER!”

I thought u really LOVE me.

Sir: Wo Teen Words Batao Jo Subse Jyada Bole Jate Hain ?

STUDENT: Mujhe Nahi Pata….

Sir: Shaabash Beta, Baith Jao..!

Mom: Kyu rote ho

Son: Dad NE mujhe

Kissi nahi di

Mom: Tumne unko Table

Nahi sunaya hoga

Son: bazU wali aunty ko

Kaunse tables aata hai

Dali NE dali par nazar dali,

Kisi NE is par dali,

Kisi NE uspar dali,

Hum NE jis par nazar dali,

Uske baap NE uski

Shaadi kahin aur kar dali

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he Richest Man In The Valley

A rich landowner named Carl often rode around his vast estate so he could congratulate himself on his great wealth.

One day while riding around his estate on his favorite horse, he saw Hans, an old tenant farmer. Hans was sitting under a tree when Carl rode by.

Hans said, 'I was just thanking God for my food.'
Carl protested, 'If that is all I had to eat, I wouldn't feel like giving thanks.'
Hans replied, 'God has given me everything I need, and I am thankful for it.'


The old farmer added, 'It is strange you should come by today because I had a dream last night. In my dream a voice told me, 'The richest man in the valley will die tonight.' I don't know what it means, but I thought I ought to tell you.'

Carl snorted, 'Dreams are nonsense,' and galloped away, but he could not forget Hans' words: 'The richest man in the valley will die tonight.'

He was obviously the richest man in the valley, so he invited his doctor to his house that evening.

Carl told the doctor what Hans had said. After a thorough examination, the doctor told the wealthy landowner, 'Carl, you are as strong and healthy as a horse. There is no way you are going to die tonight.'

Nevertheless, for assurance, the doctor stayed with Carl, and they played cards through the night.

The doctor left the next morning and Carl apologized for becoming so upset over the old man's dream.

At about nine o'clock, a messenger arrived at Carl's door.
'What is it?' Carl demanded.

The messenger explained, 'It's about old Hans. He died last night in his sleep.'
*******
Being rich has nothing to do with money or possessions. But it has everything to do with having a relationship with God.
*******
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MAN WITH NO ARMS

A man lost one of his arms in an accident. He became very depressed because he had loved to play guitar and a lot of things that took two arms.


One day he could not stand it anymore. He decided to commit suicide. He got on an elevator and went to the top of a tall building to jump off.


He was standing on the ledge looking down and saw this man on the sidewalk below skipping along whistling and kicking up his heels. He looked closer and noticed this man didn't have any arms at all.




He started thinking, what am I doing up here feeling sorry for myself, I still have one good arm to do things with. There goes a man with no arms skipping down the sidewalk happy and going on with his life.


He hurried down and caught the man with no arms. He told him how glad he was to see him because he had lost one of his arms and felt ugly, useless and was going to kill himself. He thanked him again for saving his life and he now knew he could make it with one arm if that guy could do it with no arms.


The man with no arms began dancing and whistling and kicking up his heels again. He asked "Why are you so happy anyway?"

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He said "I'm NOT happy; my ass
itches."

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Girl Without A Face

Girl Without A Face
Julianna Wetmore was born with a rare genetic craniofacial disorder known as Treacher Collins Syndrome. This condition normally appears as elongated or
Sagging eyes and small or missing ears and generally affects 1 in 10,000. Not only is this a rare occurrence but, Julianna has perhaps the most severe case ever seen. The condition was first seen during pre-natal scans where doctors thought that she had a cleft palate. However, the full extent of her disfigurement was not seen until she was born.

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Wooden Chips Art


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Extreme Balancing Acts

Extreme Balancing Acts


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Special Tea In Kerala

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5 heaviest people in the history

Carol Yager (peak weight 727 kg/ 1,600 lbs)

Carol_Yager

Her peak weight reached up to 727 kg (16, 00 lbs). She was also famous for losing most weight by natural means. Carol Yager lost 521 lbs weight in just three months. Her skin was breaking down due to a bacterial infection that’s why she was admitted in Hurley Medical Center. She spent terrible time till her death. Carol Yager was unable to stand or walk because of her muscles were not strong enough. She died in a young of 34. Main causes of her death were kidney failure, multiple organ failure and morbid obesity.

Jon Brower Minnoch (peak weight 635 kg / 1400 lbs)

Jon_Brower_Minnoch

Likewise Carol Yager, Job Brower was also fat in his childhood. In the age of 12 his weight was 132 kg (292 lbs). He married to Jeannette, a woman of normal weight and had two sons. Minnoch was admitted to hospital for 16 months where he lost 419 kg but after being discharged, his weight double. He couldn’t improve any better and died on September 10, 1983, at age 42.

Manuel Uribe (597 kg / 1,316 lb)

Manuel_Uribe

Like other heavy people, Manuel Uribe is also living a hard life. He spends 9 years in bed from 2001 to 2009. Even he got married in bed with Claudia on October 26, 2008. On his wedding, he spoke loud and clear to all dishearten people saying “I am proof you can find love in any circumstances. It’s all a question of faith. I have a wife and will form a new family and live a happy life”.

Walter Hudson (544 kg / 1,200 lb)

Walter_Hudson

World’s fourth heaviest power house was born in Brooklyn, New York. Walter came into lime light when he was trapped inside of his room’s door. Recue team had to break the wall to take him out. He loved to eat as once he said and I quote “”I just ate and enjoyed it”. Although he announced his wedding plans but that remains a dream for his. He died few weeks later.

Rosalie Bradford (544 kg / 1,200 lb)

Rosalie_Bradford

Rosalie Bradford was Foodaholic since her childhood. Like all other weight giants, she gained weight in young age. At the age of 14 her weight was 92 kg and 140 kg at the age of 15. Rosalie married and had one son. After her marriage, she mostly spent her time at home and gain more weight. All that depressed her much and she tried to kill her using painkillers. Her weight eventually reduced to 136 kg (300 lb). She died on November 29, 2006 in the age of 63.

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Large Hadron Collider ready to restart

The European Organization for Nuclear Research (CERN) says it expects to restart the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) by this weekend after more than a year of repairs. The 27 km (17 mi) particle accelerator was launched last year, but suffered a failure from a faulty electrical connection, damaging 53 of the smasher's 9,300 superconducting magnets. Repairs are now completed, and the plan is to begin injecting protons into the LHC this weekend, on the path to search for particles such as predicted-yet-unobserved Higgs Boson. Collected below are some photographs of the repairs, and of the LHC and some of its experiments in various stages of construction.


Combining two major ATLAS inner detector components. The semiconductor tracker is inserted into the transition radiation tracker for the ATLAS experiment at the LHC. These make up two of the three major components of the inner detector. They will work together to measure the trajectories produced in the proton-proton collisions at the centre of the detector when the LHC is switched on. Photo taken on February 22nd, 2006. (Maximilien Brice, © CERN)

2
Views of two step of an ultrasound and induction welding to interconnection between two LHC magnet at sector 3-4 during repair operation on March 26th, 2009.

3
Visible damage to the LHC magnets in sector 3-4 of the LHC on November 12th, 2008. On September 19th, 2008, as the LHC was being switched on, a faulty electrical connection between two of the accelerator's magnets caused a large helium leak, which violently vented 6 tons of helium into the tunnel. The resulting temperature rise damaged some 53 magnets.

4
Detail of some of the damage done to the LHC magnets in sector 3-4 on September 19th, 2008.

5
Moving and placement of a quadrupole at sector 3-4 in the LHC tunnel on April 30th, 2009.

6
A replacement magnet for LHC sector 3-4 being lowered in the tunnel on January 19th, 2009.

7
Moving and placement of a quadrupole at sector 3-4 in the LHC tunnel on April 30th, 2009

8
Transporting a quadrupole through sector 3-4 in the LHC tunnel on April 30th, 2009.

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Installation of a new dipole in the LHC tunnel at sector 3-4 on April 6th, 2009.

10
Detail of one of the LHC's 18-kW 4.5-K refrigerator units, part of the larger cryogenic system used to maintain superfluid helium temperatures of about 1.9k (-271.25° Celsius or -456.25° Fahrenheit). Photograph taken on April 28th, 2008.

11
The silicon strip tracker of the Compact Muon Solenoid (CMS) nears completion. Shown here are three concentric cylinders, each comprised of many silicon strip detetectors (the bronze-coloured rectangular devices, similar to the CCDs used in digital cameras). These surround the region where the protons collide.

12
An automated magnetic tape vault at CERN computer center, seen on September 15th, 2008. The tapes are used to store the complete LHC data set, from which a fraction of the data is copied to overlying disk caches for fast and widespread access. The handling of the magnetic tape cartridges is now fully automated, as they are racked in vaults where they are moved between the storage shelves and the tape drives by robotic arms.

13
Final work is done on the detectors inside the L3 magnet of the ALICE experiment on July 10th, 2008.

14
View of the CMS Detector before closure on August 17th, 2008.

15
Portrait of Lyn Evans, LHC project Leader, on December 3rd, 2008.

16
Shielding of the L3 magnet, ALICE experiment on July 10th, 2008

17
Final preparations on a replacement magnet ready to be lowered into sector 3-4 on November 27th, 2008.

18
A tunnel with part of one of the beam dumps of the LHC at point 6. Beam dumps are absorption mechanisms where the powerful beams can be extracted completely from the LHC, consisting of a 7m segmented carbon cylinder, 700mm in diameter, contained in a water-cooled steel cylinder, surrounded by about 750 tons of concrete and iron shielding. The sign at top warns of the presence of helium, argon and/or nitrogen in nearby pipes - gases that (if they leaked out) could displace oxygen and cause unconsciousness.

19
Insertion of a Time Of Flight (TOF) module in the upper part of the spaceframe for the ALICE experiment. Charged particles in the intermediate momentum range are identified in ALICE by the TOF detector. The time measurement, in conjunction with the momentum and track length measured by the tracking detectors is used to calculate the particle mass.

20
Detail of the LHCb Magnet, seen on September 5th, 2008.

21
A collimater for the LHC. The powerful LHC collimation system protects the accelerator against damage due to unavoidable regular and irregular beam loss.

22
View of the LHC machine in the tunnel at the junction part with the beam dump at point 6 on July 25th, 2008.

23
View of the CMS Detector before closure, on August 17th, 2008.

24
Last views of the L3 magnet before its closure on June 28th, 2008.

25
Closing of the 30-inch-thick, 430 ton L3 door on the I side, ALICE experiment, on June 11th, 2008.

26
A radiofrequency chamber of the LHC. Radiofrequency chambers give a kick to the protons once per circuit to increase their speed. Original here.

27
A fireman examines emergency exit signage in the LHC tunnel on February 21st, 2008, during an exercise with French, Swiss and CERN firemen.

28
Work on the ATLAS semiconductor tracker barrel. Precision work is performed on the semiconductor tracker barrel of the ATLAS experiment. The semiconductor tracker will be mounted in the barrel close to the heart of the ATLAS experiment to detect the path of particles produced in proton-proton collisions.

29
Integration of the three shells into the ATLAS pixel barrel, the innermost tracking device of the experiment.

30
Installing the ATLAS calorimeter in November of 2005. The eight torodial magnets can be seen on the huge ATLAS detector with the calorimeter before it is moved into the middle of the detector. This calorimeter will measure the energies of particles produced when protons collide in the centre of the detector.



®Trust God, he knows ur future. He may not reveal it to you but he will walk with you as the future unfolds. Don't trust the stars, trust the one who made them. Gud Day!
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